Trigger warnings...

So i recently got in to an argument with someone about trigger warnings. That has been what spurred the creation of this blog and without more ado, a blog on that topic

In short, I think trigger warnings are over-used, do women (mostly, but also men) a disservice and are incorrectly named. Let me explain..

I have been called to task for saying they do people a disservice, but my reasoning is this:
If you use it correctly, fine. write 'trigger warning: abuse' and then go on to discuss the thing in detail. People who don't want to read in depth stuff can scroll on by and people who are happy to deal with it, can read at leisure. The problem comes when people write (for example) 'trigger warning abuse' and then go on to talk about all sorts of random things, including the line 'I was abused' (or someone else was) but nothing further. At this point, there is no point in the trigger warning, as the warning is as graphic as the text.

I see in so many places recently, we go out of our way to make sure we don't upset people, so we add in trigger warnings wherever there is the slightest mention of upsetting things, not just where there's in depth discussion. This is where we do people a disservice. If i cannot deal with a full-on discussion of abuse, but can happily read a mention of it, I am prevented from making a choice by this use of trigger warnings. I cannot make an informed decision about what's under that cut and so am forced to scroll on by. If text were, for example marked 'contains discussion of abuse' I know what I'm looking at (or not, as the choice may be). If however, we feel the need to 'trigger' for a 'mention of abuse', surely at that point, we need to trigger warning our trigger warning. And this is where it would just get daft.

My other point is the name of the thing. Like many people, I have a past where Bad Things (tm) happened to me. I'd rather they hadn't, and I spent a lot of time dealing with them. There are things about those experiences that get to me. But the 'trigger' is nothing to do with the word 'abuse' (or even a discussion of it, and I know, I'm lucky there), but say a specific (and innocuous) phrase to me, and I'm that terrified child again. I don't like it, but I can't help it. That's my trigger. and very few people know this certainly not strangers online. Being upset is not the same thing as being triggered, and to assume that a thing is triggering because it's upsetting is not a good thing.

As survivors, we do a very good job of dealing with things in our every day lives that are upsetting. Turn on the news, and most stories are upsetting. Watch a soap, and there's a story on domestic violence, or abuse. As adults, most of us are able to go 'eep no' and turn over if we need, or make sure we have people around if we want to watch. The tv doesn't often give us those warnings about what's about to happen, and in many cases, the internet does. But let us make an informed decision about what we are reading, and stop to consider that your triggers are not my triggers, no matter how upsetting the material is.

Thanks for reading!